7 muddy secrets that let rural romance bloom in the New Year
Thursday, December 30th, 2021
2021 has been a year in which making meaningful muddy connections has bloomed. Here, mud inspired couples reveal their top tips after meeting on Muddy Matches.
At Muddy Matches, we have seen many thousands of new matches and new relationships bloom into countryside engagements, lockdown weddings, the pitter patter of tiny wellies and life changing decision to ‘up sticks’ and follow a new path in life.
So, we invited a number of the mud-loving couples to share their secrets of success when it comes to forming connections that can outlast a lockdown and give reason to look forward as life as we know it unlocks further.
Here are their top tips to creating a meaningful and lasting connection that genuinely bloom:
? Be patient and persevere
“It was 3 weeks before I got a reply to the message I sent him but it was well worth the wait” says Sophie who met her muddy match with us 18 months ago and now live together on the family farm, having left her old life 160 miles north.
Many of our active singletons live busy lives – often tied to land and livestock – and often remote, out in the sticks. They are not the 9-5 office-based generation of dater you find on other dating apps. Nor are they glued to their phones 24/7 waiting for the ping to say you are online or keen to connect; their commitments in the fields, in the yards, and on the farms just don’t allow it. So send a message, dish out a wink, add to your favourites and WAIT. Give it time and don’t expect waves of replies to land with you immediately.
? Understand what your future life could look like
“I fully appreciate that Jim works extremely hard as a farmer and time off is scarce and precious.” Nicola tells us.
It would be easy to dive into a mud-inspired relationship or farmer love with a rose tinted, chocolate box view of country life. We read many a profile with the line ‘not afraid to get my hands dirty’ but rarely is that reality. In fact our matched couples tell us remote living or life on the farm is tough, and demanding. It is something people need to understand, appreciate and grasp quickly if any relationship is to work. Compromises on lifestyle need to be made, spared responsibility needs to be accepted. One bride-to-be added her muddy match has ‘not had a holiday anyway in 26 years’ and has no intention to change that’.
And then there’s the other side of country life; Young Farmers fan Anna advises “They must have similar interests. My sister once dated someone who turned out to not like the country sports etc and, well, that was an experience when he came to the house to see pheasants hanging outside the back door ??.”
? Give it some gusto and wholehearted commitment
“It’s not something you should dip in and out of’ Lisa tells us. ‘The more time and effort you commit to it the more your profile will get noticed. That was my experience.”
Don’t expect love to just land in your lap – you really need to work at it; it’s the most popular of tips our muddy couples tell us. Online dating with us is fun but best results come when you give it a fair share of daily attention (and we mean every day) put the legwork in and nurture your connections.
Be regular with your sign in, make sure you ‘interact’ with a minimum 15-20 different people daily – be it winks and favourites – to show your interest and be courteous enough to reply to all messages.
“I subscribed solely to read a message from someone I had my eye on for some time. I’d favourited him, winked at him and kept visiting his profile. 5 weeks later he messaged me and I subscribed immediately. We have been dating for over a year now”, says Laura, who switched to Muddy Matches after being a ‘serial dater’ on other apps.
?Be content enough with life to let the guard down
“Top tip; love yourself enough to truly know you’re worthy of love and you’ll attract the right person” says Annabel, who met her Muddy Match two years ago and is now engaged to be married.
Lots of our couples mention the the importance of self contentment and of how a positive outlook on life displays itself to others through your online dating profile. It’s not ego or self confidence; just a sense of satisfaction in one’s own company and a happy-go-lucky persona alongside someone who is content in their own skin.
Research says it removes a lot of barriers when it comes to love – around agendas, respect, self worth and the pressures that come with ‘the need’ to find the one.
“I tell Tim he made it easy for me to find him. His main profile photo showed a lovely smile and an open face. I read his profile and he wrote so honestly and openly about himself.” says Lotte who remains besotted with her Muddy Match.
? Trust your gut instinct.
“We both knew from first talking we were right for each other. It bloomed from the first minute we messaged’ said Katie who found farmer love in Steve with us. “We both found people very soon on but then realised quickly that it was each other we wanted to move on with.”
Heart over head or head over heart?. Our muddy members agree on one thing; it’s more about your gut feel than any logic or seasoned reason. It may not be the butterflies that come from the nervousness of a real life meet but even online your gut instinct can be a good indicator of where a connection is heading from the get go. It is biology’s way of giving you a little sign that there’s something there. You just need to unearth if it’s mutual.
Muddy Matches narrows the search down to people who have the same interests but instant chemistry and the magic… that’s a personal thing that only you can know the extent of.
? Don’t be put off by long distance love
“I couldn’t stop thinking of him even though he lived over 400 miles away from me” says one muddy matcher who swapped Manchester for the Isle of Mull in the Scottish Outer Hebrides to be with her match.
The clue is in the words ‘rural and remote’ romance. Our singletons are more likely than most to embrace long distance dating and aren’t put off by the prospect of upping sticks – often hundreds of miles – when it comes to matters of the heart. Whilst ‘local’ is important to some due to lifestyle, our singles are well aware that they may just have to go the extra mile to make their relationship really work and they are more than willing to do it, often leaving behind a life more urban to set up home in the countryside.
It’s more often than not that we hear of love blooming between people who are undertaking 200-300 mile weekly round trips to see each other. Half way house dates are common (*or were before the pandemic struck) – now virtual dating fills the void.
? Be open minded and expect the unexpected
“My Muddy Match thought he wanted a petite woman but it works out he loves me; a very curvy woman in jeans, tshirt and flip flops.” says Annie about her Roger.
Leaving what you consider ‘your type’ at the door and ‘breaking the mould’ of what you usually go for is a common theme from our muddy couples. They all propose taking an open mind into online dating and exploring singletons of all background, hair colour, eye colour, build and from all walks of country life – and then be bold and take a chance on someone who shares the same interests.
“He looked nothing like my type at all from his photos but he was interesting and we just got on. He ticked a lot of my boxes once I got to know what he was about.” says Jenny who is 8 months into a muddy relationship after first being sceptical.
Overall though, the message is simple: just get yourself out there, have fun and, however daunting it may seem at the start, embrace it for what it is.
For more mud-inspired success packed with feel good and farmer love, click here.
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