What to Say in a Dating Message

Saturday, August 18th, 2018

Sending a first message to someone is best way to show that you are interested in them and hopefully it will lead to a first date. We have put together some tips to help you to write an opening message.

Don’t panic

Don’t panic about sending a perfect message, it is better to send something, than nothing at all. A simple ‘Hi, how are you? You seem like a fun person’, is better than deciding that only perfect will be good enough and will hopefully open up conversation between you.

Keep it short

An opening message should be short and sweet. Try to keep your text under a few lines so that the recipient isn’t overwhelmed with information. You don’t need to tell the person lots about yourself as they will be able to look at your dating profile if they would like to know more about who you are.

Refer to their profile text

Referring to someone’s dating profile text shows that you have taken the time to read it carefully. Try to compliment something that they have said in their profile, or to point out your common interests. For example, you could say ‘I just had to get in touch with you as I also love [insert obscure hobby]’.

You can also refer to something in their photos such as a funny outfit, or a tourist attraction that they have been to. However, try to avoid commenting on their looks in a crude way  — ‘nice tits’ is not a way to impress someone.

Ask a question

Asking a question makes it easier for someone to respond to your message. If possible, try to ask a question that shows that you have paid attention to their profile text and relate it back to your life. For example, if they mention that they enjoy going to festivals, you could say ‘I saw that you love going to festivals, have you been to any good ones lately? I just got back from Bestival’.